"Hello, Tech Support... how may I help you?"

* Helpdesk - What kind of computer do you have? Female customer - A white one...
* Female Customer - Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out. Helpdesk - Have you tried pushing the button? Customer - Yes, sure, it's really stuck. Helpdesk - That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note ..." Customer - No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry.
* Helpdesk - Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen. Female Customer - Your left or my left?
* Helpdesk - Good day. How may I help you? Male customer - Hello... I can't print. Helpdesk - Would you click on start for me and ... Customer - Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates damn it!

* Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...
* Customer - I have problems printing in red... Helpdesk - Do you have a colour printer? Customer - Aaaah....................thank you.
* Helpdesk - What's on your monitor now ma'am? Customer - A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.
* Helpdesk - And now hit F8. Customer - It's not working. Helpdesk - What did you do, exactly? Customer - I hit the F-key 8-times as you told me, but nothing's happening...
* Customer - My keyboard is not working anymore. Helpdesk - Are you sure it's plugged into the computer? Customer - No. I can't get behind the computer. Helpdesk - Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back. Customer - OK Helpdesk - Did the keyboard come with you? Customer - Yes Helpdesk - That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard? Customer - Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work!
* Helpdesk - Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7. Customer - Is that 7 in capital letters?
* A customer couldn't get on the internet. Helpdesk - Are you sure you used the right password? Customer - Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it. Helpdesk - Can you tell me what the password was? Customer - Five stars.
* Helpdesk - What antivirus program do you use? Customer - Netscape. Helpdesk - That's not an antivirus program. Customer - Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
* Customer - I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!
* Helpdesk - Microsoft Tech. Support, may I help you? Old woman - Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for you. Can You please tell me how long it will take before you can help me? Helpdesk - Uhh..? Pardon, I don't understand your problem? Old woman - I was working in Word and clicked the help button more than 4 hours ago. Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me?
* Helpdesk - How may I help you? Customer - I'm writing my first e-mail. Helpdesk - OK, and, what seems to be the problem? Customer - Well, I have the letter a, but how do I get the circle around it?