24 and there's so much more...

Brad and I in the pot yard

24 years ago today my world changed.

You see, as an adoptee I had never known anyone who was of my blood.
Until you were born.
My Son.

And neither of us have looked back.

I'd originally written a post wherein I lay out fatherly advice in the hopes you would understand where you are at.
Of course, who am I to tell you where you're at.
You know this already.

Instead, I will simply say that You are loved.
No matter what you say, no matter what you do... how you feel.
Deny it all you want, there is nothing you can do to change that.
You are My Son and You are loved.

There's a day that neither of us could ever forget.
You said to me that I was the nicest person you knew.
It brought tears to my eyes that day.
The thought of that day still does Son.

As for me... I'm still that person.
Perhaps more so.

On this, the anniversary of the day of your birth... I just want to wish you well in all that you do.
You may think otherwise, but, I do have faith that you will 'figure it all out.'

Perhaps you already have.
You just have to accept it.
As I have accepted you.

Oh you've given your best to deny it.
Thrown it in my face.
In the end, you cannot fool yourself.
You know exactly where you're at and what needs doing.
Of that I have no doubt.

I know I disappoint you.
You're not the first, believe me.
I am who I am and your approval is not needed.
I make my own path, just as you do.
No matter what anyone says/does.
For that... I am proud of you.
The absolute willingness to be who you are despite all odds.

Nothing can change who we are except ourselves.

Why would you want to?

One day you will understand and accept yourself.
And when you do... you will come (again) to accept Me as Your Father.

I've told you, I won't always give you what you want... but I WILL always give you what you need.
Even if you hate me for it.

Remember though... it is in the journey that we learn, that we grow... that we accept.

I wonder if you know how profound an affect you've had on my life Brad.
Not just because you are my Son, but because of who you are as a person.

I am heading out west in three days time.
I don't know when next we will meet.
But we will see each other again.
Know this.

And I cannot wait for that day My Son.

When the time comes... when you have accepted who you are, when you have accepted the journey that you are on, I will be there. As I always have. Every time you close your eyes... every time you look in the mirror... every smile, every tear... I am there with you. Always.

I wouldn't have it any other way.

Happy Birthday My Son.
Enjoy your day.

Until we meet again...